don't you see, don't you see that the charade is over?
2012-04-17 -- 11:22 fi p.m.

i'm overwhelmed with so much to do, but i can't concentrate on anything.

it's almost summer and i can't help but think how different this one will be from the last two.

i get that dashboard confessional song lyric, "your hair is everywhere" stuck in my head a lot. because you said that to me last summer one night when we were in the basement, because my hair is in fact always everywhere. i started singing that song, like i do whenever someone accidentally says a song lyric. you said, "i don't think that's what he's talking about in that song." and i said, "no, i'm actually pretty sure that's exactly what it's about." it was kind of ironic, i guess. but what in my life isn't?

i have this feeling that you will probably ask her to marry you soon. sometimes i just want to text you and ask.

it's good though, ya know? having that person in your life who grounds you and has this sort of life plan. a person who is always sure of themselves and what they feel and how they believe. i know how important that is, because that is also what i have. a person who can put you in front of themselves no questions asked. a good person, someone better than yourself.

it was late one night after the ballpark and we were talking,

"i don't want this to get bad," i said.
"...then why are you here?"
"because i don't know how not to be. do you think we're bad people?"
"in this situation? well, i don't think we're the good ones."

when you finally pulled away i didn't blame you. look at me, i never leave.

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