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2013-01-26 -- 12:27 a.m.

I fell this morning on the ice and I told myself not to cry, big girls don't cry. We got a paper on our door today saying we won't be able to keep Tink and pushed back tears, we'll fix it. My financial aid is mixed up and I'm not sure I'll be able to pay for school this semester, but I'll find a way.

I can't stop sobbing and i'm so drunk from all the wine my boyfriend wouldn't drink with me. And I'm so painfully sad in so many different reasons. And I want to wake my boyfriend up and ask him why we are so different now and why i struggle so hard to feel anything for anyone. But he won't be able to answer me even if I ask because he won't know how.

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